What is true devotion?
Is it mere allegiance to a particular deity or prophet? Does it necessitate a
change in lifestyle? How does one know if one qualifies as a devotee? In
Chapter 12 of the Bhagwad Gita Krishna lists 35 qualities of a devotee that
help assess our spiritual level as well as develop the qualities to evolve
further.
The first quality is
‘advesta sarvabhutanam’, one who hates no being. Yet the worst battles have
been fought in the name of religion. People who profess to have devotion
to the Lord often have conflict-ridden relationships. Devotion is not
about professing love to God, it is the ability to love all. How can you love
an unknown, unseen God when you dislike those you interact with daily?
The world lacks
inclusive love. Everyone is deeply entrenched in feelings of otherness,
antagonism and bitterness. This springs from insecurity and you project
imaginary enemies. Partners are viewed as opponents, benefactors are viewed
with suspicion and you end up utterly lonely and isolated. The Gita says there
are no adversaries out there. Your worst foes are within. It is your lack of
self-sufficiency that projects enemies outside. Yudhisthira was called
‘ajatasatru’, one whose enemy
was not born because he did not consider anyone as a malefactor.
Even the love people
claim is not true love. It is attachment, self-love. You expect returns from
the person you love, make demands and impose restrictions. Ultimately the
relationship breaks down. Attachment is the single most important cause of friction
between spouses and the yawning gap between parents and children.
The solution is to
become detached. People misunderstand detachment as giving up relationships.
Many reject the idea and continue to suffer the devastating effects of
attachment. A few give up their families and suffer. There are three states of
being – indifference or lack of feeling, attachment or selfish love and
detachment or pure love. The Gita asks you to give up selfishness which comes
in the way of meaningful relationships. Continue the association but let go of
expectations and demands.
Assess the people
around you; understand them for what they are. Then you will not have
unreasonable expectations of them. Do you hate a lion for its ferocity? Do you
dislike a deer for its timidity? Do you get upset if a dog barks at
you? No. You understand that they all function according to their nature.
But you complain about a neighbor or boss because you have no understanding of
their nature. As long as you feel negatively about anyone you will suffer, not the other person. If
you want to be free of stress you must address your most intense dislikes.
In the past, the
extended family lived together, harmoniously. Now, even nuclear families are breaking
up because of selfishness. Single parents are becoming the
norm! Enlarge your circle of love. Identify with the larger community. As
your love expands, the friction in existing relationships reduces and you
become truly happy.
When you think of your
body you see maximum separateness. Move to your mind and you see oneness within
the family. Identify with the intellect and you see oneness among all. It
does not matter whether they are educated or not, wealthy or poor, refined or
crude. They are all yours. Take the leap into the realm of the Spirit and
all differences vanish. You see yourself in all beings and all beings in your
own Self. You will be free of hatred.
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